today was a strange day....long deja vu. the longest i have had till now. went on for around 5 mins....not like a single instant stuff.....a long procession of images and feelings and sounds. i should say my awareness is increasing. welcome i guess. i wanted to keep somethings private but due to a default setting on my blog list i guess parts of me went out to the world. the deficiencies have been corrected.

other than that, downloaded lotsa movies and music. the world of internet is amazing.....exactly the things that consciousness would need for its expansion and play. mangal pandeys songs sit on my hard disk....good stuff. a r rehman is a gandharva of the highest order for sure. unfortunately converted into a muslim but thanfully still in india. i saw the guy across the line last year when i was entering usa. he too was coming in for the independence day celebrations i guess in new york. i bowed to him and he bowed in return. for some reason i feel i am going to see him again.

otherwise, another book on tantra has arrived. ajit mookerjee is the guy who has got all this stuff out into the world. this one deals extensively with rituals, mantras, ways of doing 'the experiments' which takes one towards......well, ONE. this is what can be called the raja yoga. i guess i am on a path towards changing paths. gyana to raja but raja is more fun that gyana. gyana is kinda dry and this is kinda wet. gyana is advaita and in raja one has to deal with duality first. gyana may be a bit lop-sided but raja is life inclusive. i am getting paradoxical for a moment here....if i know about something which is all inclusive gyana yoga must be given its due respect. but its going to be like this....gyana and raja will mix in me. happy??

saw all these various tantric objects up for sale. feel like going back to india and buy all i wish to buy from shops along the road for few dollars equivalent...including the human skulls (called kapala in tibet-used for tantric rites. don't u see that pic!! kapala literally means forehead in indian languages) which one might get for $4 around may be. billion people in india.....what is the shortage of skulls anyway. lemme see if maa calls me around sometime. but raja yoga costs money and if i gonna do something i better get rich for once. but wealth is also a kind of power and power without knowledge is dangerous. i guess i am also learning vital lessons as i advance towards being rich. coz for some reason although i am no.3 my name is 12 which puts me in a position of a perpetual learner. so much for still being a student......HOT.